Notwithstanding your friendly endeavors to dissuade me from my intention of accompanying the Duke of Crillon in the ensuing campaign, I find my inclination, honor, and, let me add, my interest too nearly concern’d to admit the most distant idea of desisting: perfectly convinced, however, of the generous & candid motives which influence your conduct, I think it indispensably incumbent upon me to explain to you in the most serious manner my reasons for persevering.

In this unhappy æra of war & commotion, Politicians & Soldiers are equally necessary: at a distance from my Native Country, & consequently incapable of serving it immediately in a military line, I think it still my duty to embrace every opportunity of acquiring a degree of experience which may one day prove beneficial: your partiality to my abilities induces you to suppose politics my proper sphere: friendship seems more prevalent than judgement in that conjecture: my present object is the attainment of the Spanish languague; the alternative is to retire to some Village, or spend a few months in the army; the latter is infinitely more agreeable, less expensive & more consistent with my future plans of Life:.— Here, Sir, permit me to call your attention to some minute particulars relative only to myself.

Neither your friendship nor my own caution, can, I find, protect me from the machinations of a powerful & insidious Enemy: to his malicious insinuations I can alone impute that universal coldness with which every person in the least influenced by him continually avoids me: Suspicions to the prejudice of my character are infused into the minds of all who appear disposed to treat me with civility: attempts have been, and are daily & hourly made, to irritate, & render me discontented with you, & at the same time to seduce me into pursuits which would tend to lessen your good opinion of my honor & morals:—the most infamous falsehoods have been reported even to yourself by the same perfidious & cruel Author:—your Secretary Mr. Wm. Carmichael is the person to whom I allude.

Justly incensed & disgusted at this unprovoked & inhuman treatment; actuated by the most honorable & ardent desire of exculpating myself from aspersions equally odious & ill founded; & of obtaining some degree of respect amongst my present deluded acquaintances, I have formed the design of entering, if possible, into the family of His Grace of Crillon, and serving as a Volunteer in the intended Embarkation from Cadix: The connexions which I may there form; the reputation which only a decent line of conduct will inevitably procure; may perhaps convince the world that malice, not candor, could injure me: Mr. Carmichael at first warmly opposed my intention but at present, for obvious reasons, stimulates me to it with the most artful appearance of disinterested friendship.

Whether I shall succeed, or not, is as yet uncertain; but whatever may be the event, these considerations maturely weigh’d, will I hope induce you to think more favorably of the design of Yr. Excellency’s Most Obt: Hume. Servnt.1